snowday*

Greetings from the frozen tundra!
Haha! Ok... I realize it's not that bad, but it IS pretty darn cold!
Cold enough for both Jordan and I to have the day off due to store/school closings.
And for us both to have acquired a strange case of the sniffles since we've been inside Bread Co.

I made some delicious Cinna-bon muffins for a late desert last night and they made for an equally delicious breakfast this morning. After tending to my very hungry and very cold kitten ( our apartment has hard wood floors and no matter what we do it drops to about 55 degrees every night) I bundled up and watched the news with my cup of juice and muffins. Jordan woke up this morning to my insanely funny boss calling:
"Only essential personnel are required to come on base today, and we are definately NOT essential!! So tell Danielle not to worry about coming in today."

Haha! I love Debby. She's in her 60's and she's my size, but she was born and raised in East St. Louis and she is tough as nails! She's also unbelievably funny. She isn't bad mouthed or anything, but she IS terribly blunt and sarcastic. She's already adopted me, invited Jordan and I out for her family's annual bbq, and EXPECTS our attendance, marked my birthday AND Jordan's on her personal calendar, measured me to knit me a scarf, and leaves just enough coffee and creamer in the fridge everyday for me to have a cup when I get to work. I've also made a habit of getting to work a half an hour early just to hang out with her and talk to her because I enjoy her company so much.

"That being said"... (as Debby always says) work has been going well. I had one bad day, last Saturday where I got so overwhelmed that I had a panic attack and cried in front of everyone in the store. But, Debby came to the rescue and helped me figure everything out. She told me later that working there is basically "baptism by fire" and that every person that has ever worked there (including her) has broken down crying at least once, which made me feel a million times better. Since then things have rolled along pretty nicely. The store is slow, which has been good for learning, and for catching up on some good reading, and getting to know all the people that work around me. I've actually gotten fairly good at all of the different repairs that we have to do, and the difficult stuff isn't too intimidating anymore.

Debby has also been extremely kind and she found a place for me to help out over Valentine's Day and make some extra money whenever I'm needed. So, starting next week I'll be helping out our friend Mary. She's the manager of the flower shop across the plaza from us, and she has breast cancer. She's starting her radiation therapy this week and I was so excited to be able to help her. One of my greatest passions in my teen and adult life has been supporting breast cancer awareness and prevention, helping to support clinics and survivors, as well as honor everyone who has been touched by this form of cancer. For the last nine years I've run and volunteered for the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation here in St. Louis, and over the last week Mary and I have been able to share tons of stories from the different events that we've attended through the years. Mary is a really great, soft spoken lady and if you could spare a prayer, she'll be needing a lot of strength, hope, and inner peace to get through this week and the next few weeks. I'm really excited to get to know her and help out in the flower shop. It's been a far away dream of mine to work in and maybe one day own my own flower shop, and these next few weeks will give me the chance to figure out if it is something that I really want to pursue.

Even though the weather outside is crummy, I'm really happy to have the day off with Jordan. We don't have days off together very often, especially unplanned. AND Jordan got me the best present ever for a day like today: super cute rain boots!!! I didn't own anything but canvas shoes and ballet flats... and that is NOT conducive to having warm or dry feet in this icky weather. And, due to the fact that we still don't have any kind of health insurance... shoes with tread are going to be a good thing... everyone that knows me knows how accident prone I am. Haha!


I love them! and they will also go to good use in other seasons when it's raining and I don't want to ruin my good shoes! Woo!! (I'm really excited about this-- in case you can't tell. I haven't owned rain boots since I lived in England, and it's bringing back very fond memories)

Today made me realize something else that I hadn't really thought about for a while. While we don't own a couch, cable or internet, or a full set of matching "anythings", we are very blessed to have two working cars. While we were driving to Bread Co. today there were A LOT of people standing outside in the sleet, in snow up to their ankles, walking or waiting for a bus... and I wanted to buy hot coffee for all of them and give them a ride. It really stinks to have to endure weather like that day in and day out, and I'm thankful that we have the things we do. That we are both able to get to and from work everyday really is a blessing, and I feel awful that I take it for granted sometimes.

So, here we sit. Bread Company music blaring in our ears, with a dozen strangers all bundled up having a warm meal. It's one of the things that I love the most about living in this city. We have such a diverse population here and it's fun to experience. Whether it's the table next to you or the Ethiopian restaurant down the street, there is always something new to see, someone new to smile at and something new to learn.

Even if we never touch, or have a real conversation, even if I never see them again they were a part of my life today, and I got to smile at them. That's enough to warm up any cold winter night*

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rocking chair, optometry, india, and me...

What a whirlwind...

I have an unbelievably grumpy and pushy fourteen year old cat fighting me for space on this tiny computer chair. She's very lucky that I love her, and that her body and my butt are just small enough to both fit.

I suppose I should explain the title of my blog, beginning with "rocking chair". This Christmas was unique in a lot of ways- some were tiny, but others, I think I'll remember the rest of my life. This year my dad built me a rocking chair.
That probably sounds silly... but it means more than you could possibly know, and it's beautiful. My dad and I share a very special bond. My whole life I've loved him, respected him and admired him long before I ever knew the weight that those words carry. He is my hero, he's the smartest man I've ever known, he has spent his life protecting other people, he is the reason I stare out windows, the reason I love birds. I have his hands, his nose, his eyebrows, and his sweet soul... And for Christmas, all he wanted was for me to be home.

My dad has been gone for the great majority of my life. Because of that there are a lot of memories that we never got to make, a lot things that we never got to do... millions of hugs that I would give anything for...
But this Christmas I was given one of my dad's sweetest secrets.
For almost 7 years, when my dad would come home late at night, after a long day, or a long trip he would come into my room while I was sleeping and pick me up in all of my blankets and he would hold me and rock me... I never knew... Sometimes it was only for a few minutes, other times he would sit up all night just rocking me and listening to me breathe.
For seven years.
It was something he never told my mom... something he never did with my sister... something just for me and him. Just like my "Binky" and Yogie the Bear... just like ice skating, and the night I finally got to dance with him...
So he built me a rocking chair for Christmas, and he gave me a little piece of his secret heart.
It's a beautiful chair, and one of the most precious things I've ever been given.


The second part of the title is "optometry".
This week I started my new job. After two months of searching, and a million job applications, I finally found one that fits. I'm a lab technician at an optometry clinic and it's wonderful. It's very challenging, but I've found that it is extremely rewarding. I work for a great lady who has taken a very quick and keen interest into making this experience more than just another job for me. Over the next year or so she's going to be training and tutoring me to become a liscenced optometrist. We'll see how it goes! Today was slow, but it ws my first day on my own, so that was a great thing. I got to meet a lot of people and I learned how to do three new things today. I replaced a sweet old man's nose pads, styled a very sweet blonde haired lady and did repairs for four other people. The most challenging repair today was re-wiring and fitting a pair of half frame sunglasses. It took me a little while, but the lady was very patient and I was very proud of myself when I was finished.
So, if you have access to the Air Force base and ever have problems with your eyewear, or you just want to visit, I work in the little mall in the front of the BX and I'd love to see you!

Which brings me to "India."
Tariq is the gentleman whose kiosk is right next to my shop. He's from India, and he sells the most beautiful handmade novelty items! I met him a few days ago, but today was the first time I really got to talk to him and he's funny and very smart. He's a travelling salesman of sorts. His entire family lives in India and his parents, along with his sisters and other families in their neighborhood, hand make everything that he sells. I asked him why he picked the job and he told me "I didn't pick it. My family has always had this business, and it's very important to me that our business does well. Not for me, but for all of the people who depend on me. You see, India is one of the most beautiful places in the world, but many people have nothing. I do this so my family and the people we care about always have something."
I was stunned. How many people are that selfless with their lives? He's 37 and he travels every six months to another Air Force Base to promote his family's business. He was a doctor in India. He went through 8 years of college at a private university... and he walked away from it to take care of other people. We talked for a couple of hours tonight about so much, the United States, India, traditions, movies, his family, and all of our travels. After meeting him, and listening to his some of stories I've decided that one day I'd really love to go to India.

I mean, seriously, how many people do you know who grew up riding elephants?

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happy birthday jaxon!

Jaime, this is for you to read to your sweet little man!


Dear Jax,

Today is your second birthday, and in honor of this special occasion I thought I'd write a blog just for you. Even though you've only been in our lives for two years, you've made a colossal impact on so many peoples lives. With your bright smile and loud laugh you have completely captured all of our hearts, and you have been instrumental in teaching many people about adoption, trust, and most importantly-- God's love.
I hope you know that is no small feat. I especially want you to know how important you are you me, and how much you've changed my life. I worked with your mom two years ago, when her and your dad were waiting patiently for God to bring you into all our lives. Your mom and dad had been preparing and praying for a long time before that, but they only found out about you a little while before you were born. During that time, I got the chance to know your parents better, your mom in particular, and she was the very first person to talk to me in depth about adoption. I never really understood how hard it was, and how long the process can take... it takes so much trust and patience and hope. It gave me a whole new respect and admiration for families who adopt and provide foster care.
That is when I started praying. To be honest, I hadn't prayed for much outside of my own life and heart before then, but I was so in love with your parent's dream and so touched by how hard they worked and how much they endured that just the thought of you lit a fire in my heart. You were loved, immeasurably, before you ever took your first breath. I prayed for you, your birth mother, and your mom and dad everyday. I remember shortly after you were born, and the e-mail your mom sent out. I was so excited to finally see a picture of you, and I kept praying, because I knew that your parents still had so much to go through in order to bring you home. Your mom and dad are some of the bravest people I've known. They'll never admit it, but they truly are. They were prepared to do anything they had to for you, and they did.
The very first time I got to hold you was when you were a little over a month old-- maybe two, in the bank where your mom and I worked. You were a teeny little thing back then-- I don't think I'd held a baby that new before you. I could feel your little heart beating through all of your warm blankets, and you completely broke my heart in all of the best ways. You were the first miracle I'd ever experienced, the first dream I'd ever witnessed, come true.
I've loved getting to know you, and watching you grow into such a sweet, smart little boy. You really are a miracle. You beat immense odds time after time and came out smiling. I still pray for you, and your mom and dad everyday. I carry you in my wallet, and for the rest of my life I'll carry the lessons that God taught me through you, in my heart.

Happy birthday, Jax. I love you.

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I wake every morning

to the sound of jack hammers, breaking glass, drills, and debris of every kind falling into a giant metal bin two stories down and about 15 feet away from our bedroom window.
they're renovating the building next door to us and slowly but surely turning it into a "condo".
We were warned about the construction before we moved in, but as with most situations we completely underestimated the length and severity of time and volume that it takes to actually undertake such an operation.

However, they did finally re-open our parking lot. After taking three weeks longer than they anticipated, we no longer have giant cracks or potholes in our driveway and parking lot which is wonderful because I'm not a fan of parallel parking on a pretty busy street.

Things are always changing. Our building, the highways, the people in our lives...
In one short month I went to the funeral of a high school friend, laughed so hard I cried, and cried until I laughed, celebrated our one year wedding anniversary, spent time with people that I haven't seen in nearly 5 years, spent hours with the best of friends, congratulated dear friends on their growing family, celebrated christmas, congratulated friends on getting engaged, and have been praying for the safety of a friend who was deployed and his family who I love.

2008 ended in a frenzy, and it's been a little hard to keep my head above water through everything. Honestly, it's been really hard. Especially since the two people that know me the best can't always be around...

But, the very best things come out of change, and the blessings just keep coming. There will be a lot to celebrate this year, and I'm so happy to be home and to be a part of everything.

Tomorrow is Sunday, and it is by far one of my favorite days... I hope we finally get to have our girls night, and that everyone is feeling better.

Here's to a New Year, and all the hope it promises.

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